What about Dignity

[Rhea Dopmeijer]

What is it about Dignity?

The mo­ment I de­cided to write about dig­nity, thoughts were fol­low­ing them­selves up about the mean­ing it has for me. It has to do with be­ing hon­or­able, re­spect and wor­thi­ness in my opin­ion.

The moment I decided to write about dignity, thoughts were following themselves up about the meaning it has for me. It has to do with being honorable, respect and worthiness in my opinion. It also has to do with the way we perceive each other. Behaving with dignity, sometimes is challenging when we are feeling hurt or not understood. When people are tending to disrespect you, making you feel degraded, not worthy. It also has to do with the way […]
It also has to do with the way we per­ceive each other. Be­hav­ing with dig­nity, some­times is chal­leng­ing when we are feel­ing hurt or not un­der­stood. When peo­ple are tend­ing to dis­re­spect you, mak­ing you feel de­graded, not wor­thy. It also has to do with the way we per­ceive our­selves.

Self-worth is a qual­ity, which makes it eas­ier to re­spond with more calm­ness and re­spect. When peo­ple are treat­ing you with­out re­spect for your ef­forts, or the work you do, how to re­spond to that.

Is it pos­si­ble to act with dis­re­spect­ing your­self, and then when con­fronted with a sit­u­a­tion, come out the other end with dig­nity? We some­times can loose re­spect for some­one we love and hold dear, caused by the way they act. When a loved one is fac­ing an ad­dic­tion for in­stance, act­ing out un­der the in­flu­ence of al­co­hol or drugs.

Judge­ment plays a big part in the way we look at our­selves as well oth­ers. When we do some­thing and feel ashamed about it af­ter wards, we also face los­ing self-re­spect. Not be­ing wor­thy to be loved or dis­re­spected for the way we han­dle a sit­u­a­tion like be­tray­ing a loved one. How to han­dle this with dig­nity?

Don’t we all have come across a sit­u­a­tion we are hav­ing trou­ble with deal­ing in love and re­spect, even though we love the one caus­ing this dilemma? To hold on to your self-worth, your­self love, is­n’t easy when you are mak­ing mis­takes, which hurt not just your­self.

Hurt­ing the ones, we love, is the hard­est thing to for­give, as well for­giv­ing your­self. Dig­nity is also syn­onym for mag­nif­i­cence and grandeur, right­eous­ness and re­spectabil­ity. It is a high stan­dard to up­hold when you are at your low­est, is­n’t it?

Dur­ing my life­time, I have come across many sit­u­a­tions and peo­ple who were at their low­est point in life. Act­ing out in ways that showed their in­ner tur­moil, as well the shame and pain. How to deal with it in a way you can find your self-re­spect and self-worth again?

When it is per­sonal it re­quires lots of work to feel wor­thy of be­ing loved and re­spected again. The guilt and the shame are pow­er­ful en­e­mies in the in­ner world of some­one. When you are not used to be loved and re­spected grow­ing up, it is even the hard­est chal­lenge to deal with.

How to rekin­dle that lit­tle flame in­side the heart, when all you have en­coun­tered cru­elty and bit­ter­ness? Is dig­nity some­thing you can learn, or is it al­ready part of your char­ac­ter and per­son­al­ity? It is in­trigu­ing is­n’t it to find out if it is in your DNA so to speak. Some peo­ple seem to have that kind of dig­nity wher­ever they are.

Who have com­po­sure about them­selves, no mat­ter what sit­u­a­tion they en­counter? Who have a way of be­ing hon­or­able, and there for re­spected by those around them? Not in a cold man­ner, of­ten com­ing with com­pas­sion and kind­ness for oth­ers. They have pres­ence, which is un­de­ni­able.

Also, with crafts­man we can find the way they work filled with re­spect for the ob­ject or tools they work with. The in­ten­sity and fo­cus they show while pro­duc­ing their crafts­man­ship. We can see this with mu­si­cians as well, hold­ing their com­po­sure with ease.

The way peo­ple care able to be a teacher, or a healer. Dig­nity is shown through every as­pect within our lives. No mat­ter what we do, which po­si­tion we have in the ma­te­r­ial world, it is a qual­ity that shines through no mat­ter what.

We have seen it in some of our world lead­ers, as well in the poor­est of mankind, wear­ing the man­tle of dig­nity as a nat­ural essence and pres­ence. In cases like these, we tend to feel re­spected and loved our selves as well.

Love is a pow­er­ful com­po­nent, which holds dig­nity as one of the many qual­i­ties. So, when some­one is show­ing this form of love, able to hold up and on to the self-worth and self-love, we all see this. It is also a mir­ror, or a re­flec­tion, what is pos­si­ble to gain as well.

It might be per­ceived as a threat, or to ad­mire some­one, who is able to re­spond and re­act with dig­nity to un­fore­seen sit­u­a­tions. We have seen them through his­tory, the way peo­ple rise above them­selves. How Love can be the key to in­ner courage as well to re­spond in a way peo­ple re­spect, nev­er­the­less.

Some­times it is per­ceived as re­gal, the calm­ness within to re­act or re­spond to dan­ger or at­tacks. How many movies are made to honor he­roes through times? How much re­spect do we not have for those who can hold up the stan­dard of grandeur, or mag­nif­i­cence?

What de­fines us in the way we can hold up our dig­nity so to speak. Is it the way we re­act to sit­u­a­tions be­yond our con­trol? When we get ill, de­pend­ing on oth­ers to take care of us, in all ways. Loos­ing con­trol is dif­fi­cult for I think every­one if its about self-care and ba­sic needs, such as safety, a roof over your head, enough food to stay alive.

When you are home­less and lose your self-re­spect be­cause you lost the con­trol to take care of your­self, or your fam­ily. So many peo­ple are in that po­si­tion world­wide. 
When there is loss of deco­rum due to ill­ness, or the sit­u­a­tion is de­grad­ing. We all have seen the im­ages of those liv­ing in camps, with­out any san­i­tair fa­cil­i­ties. It is­n’t easy to hold up your pos­ture then, is it?

We might look with dis­gust at those cir­cum­stances or have our prej­u­dices and judg­men­tal thoughts about those liv­ing in such poor cir­cum­stances caused by war. Or due to the sit­u­a­tion in their coun­try, where the rich are few and the hunger and poor cir­cum­stances are the norm. How can you stay pre­sent with a sense of no­bil­ity, with a way of grandeur? Is it then just for the rich, those who are born in rich­ness and wealth?

I don’t think so. We have great role mod­els who showed us that even the cir­cum­stances can bring forth peo­ple with grandeur. With a sense of no­bil­ity, com­ing forth through their pres­ence and ac­tions. Who we re­spect and honor, be­cause they stood up against sup­pres­sion?

Like Man­dela, like Gandhi for in­stance. It is a qual­ity that is­n’t just for a few. Be­com­ing aware and con­scious about the way we re­spond is a way to learn how we are re­act­ing in re­spect. Re­spect and wor­thi­ness are part of dig­nity, as is self-love. The way we can love our­selves, makes it pos­si­ble to feel wor­thy and re­spect­ful to­wards our­selves as well oth­ers.

This process we are in, will lead to per­sonal growth. Which en­able us to feel we are all in this to­gether and are part of the out­come. Never un­der­es­ti­mate the way our re­sponse will af­fect oth­ers. It is the way we can im­presses through love and kind­ness, through com­pas­sion and re­spect, we will be per­ceived by oth­ers. It all starts within our-selves.

The way we heal and bal­ance our in­ner world, the hurt and pain, the shame and guilt. How we re­de­fine our­selves through the heal­ing process will af­fect our loved ones as well those who don’t know us. It is not just a façade; it will be a pres­ence that shines through.

Dig­nity is com­posed in lots of as­pects and will come through our ac­tions, words, as well the way we show com­pas­sion with each other. To be hon­est, re­spect­ful in every way. To hold com­po­sure com­ing from this place of Love. To have com­pas­sion with your­self as well, learn­ing from mis­takes we make along the way.

To build self-re­spect and self-worth again brick by brick. To for­give one­self as well oth­ers is one of the great­est gifts to give. Within all those com­po­nents we can find that as­pect of dig­nity within our­selves. Self-es­teem and pride in who you are, com­ing forth through Love will make a dif­fer­ence.

And so, it will be

High Self @RheaD­op­mei­jer ©
Heart­felt Mes­sages 26-4-2019