I am grateful to have the focus and awareness that I do now. I know many of us have gone through the stage of regretting or berating ourselves for not "getting it" much sooner...
"Wish I wouldn't known this earlier, when I were younger." (some are still floundering about in this stage)
There seems to always be someone else younger we see and muse over, wondering what our life would be like, had we "got it" at their age.
Meanwhile, we forget to look at our elders, who are looking at us with the same thought.
And of course there is someone showing up to prove to us what we already believe inside...We ARE creating this experience for ourselves and we are supported in receiving that manifestation.
So let's level up! Stop saying to younger people (in human years): "Oh to be your age and with your awareness!" If you say this to an empathic young person who does not yet know how to navigate their feelings & energetic perceptions, it could cause them to get lost in distracting feelings, vibrations and energies.
I say this with compassion...Some people just express their selves without any thought or consideration of others. I personally have spun my wheels in circles for a few years because I could not press through the mess of words from others' regrets, shouldas, couldas, wouldas (as i worked in a spiritual environment of the majority congregation being over the age of 45).
I could not focus on what's mine to do, despite my human age and what others perceived as "ahead of time" or "beyond her years". I also struggled to see how i created this. I finally realized that in order to utilize being an empath to my greatest ability, I MUST PUT MYSELF FIRST. If we truly chose to be an empath on this path, we have more than the one option of "Being a Victim". Put a time frame on it.
When I was taught to put others first, I was allowing others' thoughts, opinions, energies take over my life and drive my direction and focus. This is why I lost myself in others' expressions. I stopped teaching seminars, I put on a fake persona of being this "cute little girl who knows so much, beyond her years" so I could hide behind it, not owning being the GREAT BEING I AM. Teal Swan is young too and she's made herself a youtube sensation over the years...are we all to just sit back and watch someone else be that "young and wise amazing person"? No!
In not putting myself first, I found myself supporting everyone else with their causes...marketing and designing for their wonderful causes, bringing them ideas for their businesses, giving up the limelight to hide in the shadows while my shadow side managed my life. I was doing good deeds, yes. But just because it is good, does not mean it's mine to do. Meanwhile, my soul is getting pissed off, saying "Where's MY breakthrough! What am I here to do! " Who's cheering for you, if you're cheering for everyone else...and underneath it all, the sub conscious is telling the universe to do for others first.
Recently, I was sitting in a consultation for Network Spinal Analysis and I felt magnetically compelled to speak the truth, to not hold anything back, even though that had been a lifelong challenge for me. The words flew out of my mouth, revealing that I had created fake personalities to hide behind as defense mechanisms, keeping me safe from harm, being hurt yet again, by someone I trusted. The look on the practitioner's face and feeling I received was implying that I had multiple personalities.
Suddenly, I found myself feeling crazy again, even though I knew that I am not-everything is just energy. By the end of the day, I was falling apart (even though in the beginning of the day, I had felt on top of the world, like a conscious creator). I called a friend who had experienced similar challenges. He reminded me to not focus on dissecting problems and worrying over human labels. We both confirmed the POWER OF PUTTING YOUR OWN SELF FIRST and I immediately felt much better.
After I got off the phone, I heard this song in my head, "Being An Empath" and I wrote it. Within a few minutes, I was texting him with loads of gratitude, his encouragement bringing me back to center, and my center leading me back to wholeness. I felt as great as I did at the beginning of the day.
Folks, it's all illusion. Feelings just feel real until you shift to another feeling. If we believe in those feelings, we become that reality. If you feel crazy, and believe you are crazy, then you will be.
YOU ARE CREATOR. FEEL THAT. It is YOUR CHOICE, what experience you have while on Earth.
Thank You for reading...And listening.
Loads of Love, Leah N. Edwards My website